HEARTWISE
Self-kindness in life
and meditation (online).



​WHAT PEOPLE SAY


I loved, loved, loved the many things I learnt in Shakti’s self-kindness course. Before doing it, I knew “kindness” as a word and a theoretical concept existed but it was always to others or only for others. I had no idea that it could possibly be applied to oneself. She introduced my kind self to my busy, fearful, just hanging in there self. And what a difference that simple tweak has made.


- Annie Breslin, course participant 2022


​Cultivate warm-heartedness and support for your wise heart​.
​


​
​Join me to learn:

* What self-kindness really is and how to recognise when it’s needed.

* Simple, lovely meditations to enhance self-kindness.

* Reflections on self-compassionate mindset.

* Discussions of self-kindness ups and downs, what’s working, what’s not.

* State-of-the-art reach and research.

* How to encourage loved ones to use self-kindness, ie, what language to use, approach to take.


I will make it easy for you and self-kindness to become friends.
I'll make sure you've got the skills to call upon when needed.





Online

​The last session ran over
Four Wednesday evenings
March 8th - 29th 2023

* new dates TBA



​
Cultivate warm-heartedness towards
​yourself, others and your daily experience.


 ​WHY SELF-KINDNESS?
​
Strong back, soft front: the spotlight on self-kindness encourages a 'strong back' of self-respect and boundaries while cultivating a 'soft front' of warm-heartedness. 


* Coz it's not easy being human.

* Coz the nervous system is rigged to jump at every little slight, and take it       personally.

* Coz we're hard-wired to be hard on ourselves. To beat our self up. Be steely. Serious.

* Coz we're at the mercy of the relentless fight-flight-freeze mechanism        that clamps down, like a steel trap, on our best intentions and caring hearts.

* Coz the wear-and-tear of life's hard edges takes its toll ... which is tiring and uninspiring.

​When strong back/soft front are reversed (a common experience):
  • we lack the conviction to meet our goals and express our needs (= a soft back).
  • Resentment or exhaustion grows (= a strong front).


​
... if you're not ready to decide, but would like to stay in the loop.

​This four-session course gives a taste of how self-kindness can impact your mind, your mood and your life.


If meditation is new for you, take heart.

It's not as exotic or distant as it might sound. 

I will guide you step by step along the way. I'll give you tips for making it comfortable, doable and enjoyable. 


What's more, incorporating self-kindness into meditation makes it easier. It improves the whole experience.
 
​
If you've done a bit of meditation already, the course is an opportunity to commit to four weekly guided sessions. To turbocharge your practice and discover new elements to bring to the cushion.

Plus I'll be supplying you with during-the-week practice to do on your own, as an option.
​


​Self-kindness is the strength we need for negotiating life's
​emotional challenges.
​



BOOTCAMPERS:

That is, people enrolled in the Self-kindness Bootcamp:

This course will be GREAT for you:
​
  • Whether you’ve completed the bootcamp and would like a refresher.
    or
  • Didn’t get through it? Here’s your golden opportunity!




“A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day.
​A string of such moments can change the course of your life.”  
​― Chris Germer



​

SELF-KINDNESS FAQ
 
 
Self-kindness is something we can all do with, from time to time.
 
  1. HOW DO I KNOW WHEN I NEED SELF-KINDNESS?
You’ll be:
  • “Shoulding”
Look out for the “shoulds”! I should be …, I should have, they should have …
  • Overthinking
During difficulty, we panic and throw everything at a scrappy quick fix.
  • Blaming
Blaming seems easier than feeling the feels.
  • Avoiding
We push away the feels by overdoing other stuff (food, substances, streaming …)
  • Feeling alone
A big part of self-kindness is taking the birds eye view and recognising familiar human territory. Not alone, but connected!
 
 
  1. WHAT'S THE HARDEST THING ABOUT SELF KINDNESS?
 
  • Recognising you need it.
Empathy towards ourself is never our first reaction. Fear takes precedence.
  • Feeling guilty about needing it. Or superior. Or unworthy.
Common misconceptions about self-kindness are:
  • It’s weak
  • It’s self-indulgent
  • It will make me soft
  • It’s self-pity
  • It’s self-centered
 
The opposite proves to be true. Self-kindness makes us strong and resilient. It expands our horizons. We’re better able to step outside of ourselves and see a situation clearly. We are no longer absorbed by our thoughts and captive to harmful reactions.







Sessions 

Sessions will start and end with:
  • A soothing, calming, centring guided meditation.

In the middle:
  • Key self-kindness themes
  • Discussion and reflection
  • Special tips for daily self-kindness.
​



​You'll be encouraged (and guided how) to continue a regular self-kindness meditation schedule during the
​time of the course (and afterwards).

RESULTS OF ACADEMIC RESEARCH INTO
SELF-COMPASSION
​



VETERANS
A startling piece of clinical research into veteran's PTSD revealed the importance of self-compassion. Their vulnerability to developing PTSD was not the amount of combat they’d seen. It was their level of self-compassion. Whether they could be regularly kind to themselves, instead of heaping on self-criticism or self-blame.



NEW TO MINDFULNESS
A study into people learning mindfulness shows that when self-compassion is taught first, people new to mindfulness are more likely to stick with the mindfulness meditation practice.
 
Why?
 
  • Because it gives a sense of safety.
  • It makes it easier to stay with any discomfort.
  • It’s less likely a person will give up out of frustration.



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